UNTH 11

　　TEXT

　　It is humorous essay. But after reading it you will surely find that the author is most serious in writing it.

　　Ts There Life on Earth?
　
　　There was great excitement on the planet of Venus this week. For the first time Venusian scientists managed to land a satellite on the plant Earth, and is has been sending back signals as well as photographs ever since.

　　The satellite was directed into an area know as Manhattan (named after the great Venusian astronomer Prof. Manhattan, who first discovered it with his telescope 20,000 light years ago).

　　Because of excellent weather conditions and extremely strong signals, Venusian scientists were able to get valuable information as to the feasibility of a manned flying saucer landing on Earth. A press conference was held at the Venus Institute of Technology.

　　"We have come to the conclusion, based on last week's satellite landing," Prof. Zog said, "that there is no life on Earth."

　　"How do you know this?" the science reporter of the Venus Evening Star asked.

　　"For one thing, Earth's surface in the area of Manhattan is composed of solid concrete and nothing can grow there. For another, the atmosphere is filled with carbon monoxide and other deadly gases and nobody could possibly breather this air and survive."

　　"What does this mean as far as our flying sauce program is concerned?"

　　"We shall have to take our own oxygen with us, which means a much heavier flying saucer than we originally planned."

　　"Are there any other hazards that you discovered in your studier?"

　　"Take a look at this photo. You see this dark black cloud hovering over the surface of Earth? We call this the Consolidated Edison Belt. We don't know what it is made of, but it could give us a lot of trouble and we shall have to make further tests before we send a Venus Being there."

　　"Over here you will notice what seems to be a river, but the satellite findings indicate it is polluted and the water is unfit to drink. This means we shall have to carry our own water, which will add even greater weight to the saucer."

　　"Sir, what are all those tiny black spots on the photographs?"

　　"We're not certain. They seem to be metal particles that move along certain paths. They emit gases, make noise and keep crashing into each other. There are so many of these paths and so many metal particles that　it is impossible to land a flying saucer without its being smashed by one."

　　"What are those stalagmite projections sticking up?"

　　"They're some type of granite formations that give off light at night. Prof. Glom has named them skyscrapers since they seem to be scraping the skies."

　　"If all you say is true, won't this set back the flying saucer program several years?"

　　"Yes, but we shall proceed as soon as the Grubstart gives us the added funds."

　　"Prof. Zog, why are we spending billions and billions of zilches to land a flying saucer on Earth when there is no life there?

　　"Because if we Venusians can learn to breathe in an Earth atmosphere, then we can live anywhere."

　NEW WORDS

　　humorous
　　a.　funny; that makers people laugh 幽默的
　　humor
　　n.
　　essay
　　n.　散文，隨筆
　　excitement
　　n.　the state or quality of being excited　
　　planet　　
　　n.　large body in space that moves round a star esp. round the sun　行星
　　Venusian
　　a.　of or having to do with the plant Venus 金星的
　　n.　supposed Venus being 金星人
　　satellite
　　n.　spacecraft that goes round the planet earth and sends back radio and television signals; heavenly body that goes round a plant （人造）衛星
　　signal
　　n.　信號；暗號
　　astronomer
　　n.　person who studies the science of the sun, moon, stars and planets
　　天文學家　
　　telescope　
　　n.　instrument with special glasses used for seeing distant things
　　extremely　
　　ad. very 極端，非常
　　extreme
　　a.
　　feasibility
　　ad. possibility of being carried or done 可行性
　　feasible
　　a.
　　manned　
　　a.　occupied by one or more persons 載人的
　　saucer
　　n.　淺碟；茶托
　　flying saucer
　　n.　飛碟
　　conference
　　n.　meeting
　　press conference
　　n.　meeting arranged by an important person to which news reporters are invited to listen to a statement or ask questions 記者招待會
　　technology
　　n.　技術
　　conclusion
　　n.　decision of opinion reached by reasoning 結論
　　conclude
　　v.
　　reporter
　　v.　person who gathers news for a newspaper, magazine, or radio or TV station 記者
　　compose
　　vt. make up, form 組成，構成
　　concrete
　　n. building material made by mixing cement with sand, small stones and water 混凝土
　　atmosphere
　　n.　all the gasses round the earth; air in a place 大氣；空氣
　　carbon
　　n.　碳
　　monoxide
　　n.　一氧化物
　　deadly
　　a.　causing death; likely to cause death 致命的
　　gas
　　n.　氣體
　　survive
　　vi. remain alive; continue to live or exist 活下來；幸存
　　vt. remain alive after; live longer than　經歷...后還活著；比...活得長
　　survival
　　n.
　　program
　　n.　plan of what it to be done 計劃
　　concern
　　vt. be of importance or interest to; have an effect on 涉及，關系到
　　oxygen
　　n.　氧，氧氣
　　originally
　　ad. formerly 起初，原來
　　original
　　a.
　　hazard
　　n.　danger
　　hover
　　vi. stay in or near one place in the air 盤旋
　　consolidated
　　a.　untied; combined 聯合的
　　consolidate
　　vt.
　　belt
　　n.　area that has some special quality; zone （地）帶
　　indicate
　　vt. show
　　indication
　　n.　
　　pollute
　　vt. make (air, water, soil, etc.) dirty with manmade waste 污染
　　pollution
　　unfit
　　a.　not good enough; not suitable
　　particle
　　n.　粒子；微粒
　　emit
　　vt. send out 散發，射出
　　emission
　　n.
　　crash
　　v.　(cause to) break into pieces violently　墜落；猛撞
　　smash
　　v.　(cause to) break into pieces violently (使)碎裂
　　stalagmite
　　n.　石筍
　　projection
　　n.　sth. that stands out from a surface 凸出物
　　type
　　n.　a particular kind, class or group 類型，種類
　　granite
　　n.　hard grey stone used for building　花崗巖
　　formation
　　n.　sth. that is formed; way in which sth. is formed 形成（物）
　　skyscraper
　　n.　very tall building 摩天大樓
　　scrape
　　vt. rub with sth. rough or sharp 刮，擦
　　proceed
　　vi. continue after having stopped （停頓后）繼續進行
　　fund
　　n.　sum of money set apart or available for a special purpose 資金；基金
　　billion
　　n.　one thousand million
　　zilch
　　n.　zero; nothing at all

　　PHRASES & EXPRESSIONS

　　(be) known as
　　also publicly called; named　以...聞名，通常名叫
　　name after
　　give the same name as　以...名字命名
　　as to
　　about, concerning 關于
　　base on / upon
　　use as a basis or foundation for　以...為基礎，把...基于
　　for one thing ... (for another)
　　in the first place... (in the second place)
　　be composed of
　　have as members or parts　由...組成
　　as far as ... be concerned
　　to the degree that it matters to 就...而言
　　stick up
　　stand upright; project 直立；突出
　　give off
　　emit; send out 發出；散發出
　　set back
　　delay the advance of development of　耽擱；阻礙
　　
　　PEOPER NAMES

　　Art Buchwald
　　阿特.布奇沃德
　　Venus
　　金星
　　Manhattan
　　曼哈頓（紐約市中心）
　　Zog
　　佐格（姓氏）
　　Edison
　　愛迪生（姓氏）
　　Glom
　　格洛姆（姓氏）

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